Friday, July 11, 2008

The Thoughts of the English Mastiff

"I use to sleep in a queen. Then they put on an ivory quilt and now I am pushed to the bottom of the sleeping chain. Look what I am in now..." "How could they expect little ole me to fit on a twin size mattress with an 11 year old? I am weighing my options. If I wasn't so soft hearted, I might just put an ad in the newspaper looking for a new home. That would teach them."

"Oh, I could never leave this poor family...what would they do without me? They wouldn't have a guard dog to sleep the days and nights away. Their children would be forced to use the couch to watch a movie instead of lounging on me. There would be nobody around to clean up the crumbs dropped on the floor. There would be nobody to give them the kind of unconditional love and loyalty that only an English Mastiff can provide. No, I must stay and endure these horrible sleeping conditions because I am sure this family could not possibly make it without me."

woof and slobber and hair and snores,



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Marci said...

I am laughing hard. What a pathetic look!!!!! Poor baby!!

Anonymous said...

Missy is so kind to tough it out at your house even when she's been demoted to the twin size bed. I think when our couch is all worn out, we're going to give it to Mary Jane as her own personal doggie bed. It's her second favorite spot after mine & Tony's bed!

motherofmany said...

Too cute!

Amy said...

I love this post, Julie!
Out of the mouths of babes and dogs.:)