Monday, April 13, 2009

What Do You Do With the Failures?

Sometimes when you plant flowers, you end up with just as many weeds as you do flowers sharing the same space. Sometimes when you raise animals, they die unexpectedly. That has happened to us 3 times over the last two weeks. Last night it happened again. Angel our first little house lamb died unexpectedly. We knew she looked depressed. We gave her medicine, but it is hard to treat something that is unknown. We spent a lot of time trying to help her pull through her sickness, but to no avail. We are left wondering what caused her to be sick and is it contagious to the other sheep in the flock. Angel and Lilly Bit were big buddies. Lilly was always with Angel and that causes us to wonder if Lilly might be next. Perhaps Angel got injured when we put all the sheep together in a small area to prepare to weigh them. Then you wonder was it our fault that she got hurt. The questions are haunting. They even come in my sleep as I subconsciously realize that my favorite sheep is probably breathing her last breath in the barn.

Even as parents we make huge mistakes at times. We recently encountered one of those too. We do the best we can and trust the Lord with the rest, but it still leaves you with a heavy heart. What if we had done this or that differently? Would the outcome be something other than what we have now?

I am an optimistic person. I almost always look on the bright side of a situation, but there are days that it is hard to have that kind of attitude. Today is one of those days. I knew that when we started this adventure days like today would come, and I thought I was ready for them. However, being mentally ready doesn't necessarily take away the sadness that comes with the losses. For us, the most important thing to do with the failure is to ask the Lord what can we do to prevent the same thing from happening next time. We want to learn from our mistakes so we don't end up repeating them again. Certain mistakes are easier to handle than others. A few weeds in the flower bed is easy to overcome, but losing an animal that you care for isn't so easy.

grace and peace,
julie

6 comments:

LizBeth said...

Oh, Julie, I'm having one of those days, too. I'm trying to talk myself out of the anger and remind myself we must live by faith. Still hard sometimes. You work so hard and do the best you know how to do, and life still seems to beat you over the head. But we can't hold ourselves up to divinity. It's not like we knew everything to begin with and then failed. And not everything is our fault; we live in a fallen world and it won't all work right all the time. And our kids make mistakes and have to learn, but it sure hurts. We wish we could protect them from everything, and we can't. Who knows, when it's all said and done, maybe we'll discover we did some things more right than we think now.

The last two churches we pastored just beat the living daylights out of us. We "retired" early. It's been a hard row, but things are getting better. We have a lot of debt, and some days I wonder how we'll ever get on top of things. We've started all over in a new field, but some days I wonder what on earth we are doing where we are. DH is really down today. Then the sun comes out or the dog does something funny, and you feel like God just smiled down and said don't worry.

So sorry about your lamb. I know that hurts.

TX Doodler said...

Julie, I have these days often & it's hard not to feel beaten up. Recently, I had a day like this, I was driving around doing errands-just feeling down & blah. I believe God had this song play on the radio & minister to me. I hope your find comfort in the lyrics, because it often brings me back up. There's a long intro so forward in to about 1:10.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAe0q21YgTQ

Mountain Mama said...

I am praying for you!

An Accomplished Woman said...

Julie,

Thank you so much for your kind, encouraging words. My husband enjoys knowing your husband so much.

I lost two beloved dogs in the last three years. One with a brain tumor that came out of the blue and 8 days later gone. The other died tragically in our pool. It was devastating but God is with you.

It is all part of the learning process you are on. I will be praying.

Cynthia

Tracy said...

I'm sorry, Julie. It is hard. Our first milk cow died in September, and I cried so much.

Death will be swallowed up when Jesus comes back. All death. In the new heaven and new Earth, animals will not die. Cling to that hope in your sorrow. And look to Jesus. One day every tear will be dried.

Hugs,
Tracy

TnFullQuiver said...

Lizbeth,
I know just what you mean when you say something small happens and you feel like the Lord is smiling down on you. I will pray for you as well!

TxDoodler,
Thank you so much for sending me the link. I appreciate it more than you know.

Cynthia,
Learning can be hard sometimes, but it is an important part of life. I was sad to hear about your dogs. I know how much our animals mean to us, and I am sure it is no different for you. Your hubby shared one of your sugar cookies with mine at work yesterday. He called to tell me that it was pretty and tasted great! Our cookies usually end up like our cake pops, but they taste good none the less. If you ever decide to get some ladies together to teach them to decorate cookies or cakes, PLEASE let me know. I would drive to learn that skill!

Tracy,
a very good reminder...thank you for taking the time to remember.

grace and peace,
julie